The quest for revision distraction ends to extreme nerding out, medieval style.
Dom: I've yet to do any today but i plan on dedicating the rest of the day to it. The vikings are great but the carolingians are pretty dull. They're up next.
Me: Yeah they suck i'm catching up on them now i think. I reckon a couldn't write a full essay on anything, i haven't written a history essay in years arghh
Dom: I know, that's what's freaking me out. How am I supposed to write 1000 words about some dick called charlemagne?
Me: Hahaha. Yeah i'm reading about him now but he's too boring to care about. Least he wasn't a pussy like alfred i guess.
Dom: Mate, Alfred was fucking awesome. He fought off the vikings, built a load of burhs, educated the kids and created the first english navy. Asser's full of shit.
Me: Man you're good. Alfred was sweet but he was also too scared to do it with a girl, despite his military conquests. Offa was sassier i reckon
Dom: A king doesn't rule his kingdom with his dick though, does he?
Me: Maybe. Look at the success of the vikings and the barbarian invaders. If he can't get it up he can't secure the royal line. But maybe i'm being harsh on alfie, i did forget he did that whole burghal hidage thing
Dom: Yeah, it's a real shame though, a king like that could've probably got all the hot medieval chicks. But you gotta respect the burhs.
Me: They are one of the greater examples of medieval earthworks. Finer than harald's danevirke, charlemagne's incomplete karlsgrab of even offa's dyke some might say
Dom: Hahaha, i'm worried that I had to wikipedia those dudes...
No comments:
Post a Comment